The Perfect Storm

Alex and I met on my first day of a new job fresh out of college. He was my supervisor, I was the brand new & eager part-time summer staff. He was 31, I was 24 years young. He was a city slicker raised on the subway routes and The Eaton Centre, I was the country mouse raised on my BMX and the baseball diamond. The chemistry was instantaneous. It was, what I would learn later (after many trips to therapy and many more trips to Google), 'The Perfect Storm'. The Narcissist and the Empath...almost sounds like a fairy tale...except it wasn't.

He began flirting with me before my name had even dried on the employee contract, and I was positively flattered. Charming, funny, smart, a co-owner of a successful business...and the 'piece de resistance'...he was wonderful with kids. #achillesheal The fact that I was already in a serious relationship with easy-going, kind hearted Darcy didn't seem to phase him or off rail his plans. We lunched, we snuck glances in staff meetings, we took walks on our breaks... all on the guise of 'work-related'. He was my boss and I remember thinking; 'finally someone who has a career, a car, a house. Someone who was on the up and up.' (I had a tendency of dating boys who needed me to drive them to work or needed me to call in sick for work when they were far too hungover.)

It wasn't long before he asked me to leave my boyfriend. I did. I was cold and swift. I hated myself but I blocked what I had done to Darcy out. I believed Alex and I were destined, I swore I saw the signs and Ace of Base had long since been removed from the airways. He wined me, he dined me, he sent me to the spa for this country mouse's first time ever. He bought flowers and shiny things, we ate at the best restaurants...he even took me on a helicopter ride.

Just weeks after things became official the house of cards came tumbling down. The lies unraveled one at a time...the house: his sister's, the car: he shared with his mother, the business: he was no more a co-owner than I was...none of it true. By this time I was too far gone. I had left my steady, easy relationship. I had fallen hard and fast in this new exciting one. Was I phased? Ya maybe a little but not nearly as much as I should have been. Not because of the material things that he didn't actually have, but the fact he had lied repeatedly should have made me run for the hills.

That's the thing about the tale of the Empath who met the Narcissist though, the Empath rarely ever runs. She wants to heal, and love, and fix. And the Narcissist well he wouldn't be so brilliant minded and cunning if it was that easy just to walk away.

"If you, if you could get by

Trying not to lie

Things wouldn't be so confused

And I wouldn't feel so used

But you always really knew

I just want to be with you"

~Cranberries